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Shaggy the Dog

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Shaggy Dog Stories

Garden of eden
By Stephen Southwold.

Soon after Adam arrived in the Garden of Eden all the animals held a great meeting to talk things over. They wanted most of all to talk about themselves. and talk they did for three whole days and nights. At the end of it all they had settled all things with great satisfaction - with one exception.
They knew what their teeth were for,
"Teeth are to rend and slay." Roared the lion
"So they are !" Piped a little rabbit ; "So you'd better be careful."
"Claws !" Coughed the tiger, "claws are to rip and tear."
"Splendid ! lisped the mouse ; "I'm a wonderful ripper."
"Noses !" trumpeted the elephant, "noses are to sniff and scent the air. "
"Mine's a beauty !" chattered the monkey.monkey monkey show us your nose. kiss kiss
"Legs !" snarled the wolf, "Legs are to carry one swiftly to the ends of the earth."
"I love mine best of all," grunted the tortoise.
And so they went on and on, perfectly pleased and satisfied with their bodies and all their parts. BUT when it came to their tails, they simply didn't know what to say. They couldn't see no possible use for tails, and after puzzling over it for a long while, with much wrangling and jangling and bickering, they decided to go and ask Adam.
      So off they trooped in a vast crowd, and presently were come to Adam, seated lazily under a spreading banyan-tree.
"Well , my little ones, my pretty ones, what do you want ?" asked Adam.
The fox, who because of his cleverness had been made spokesman, replied, "Oh Father Adam, we are very pleased with ourselves."
    "So you ought to be," replied Adam, with a smile.
"We love our teeth," went on the fox, "and our claws and our ears and our legs and our eyes and our noses and all things that are ours."
"Well ?" inquired Adam, "What then ?"
"Except our tails," continued the fox.
"You don't like them eh?" laughed Adam.
hello Mr Fox how are you today"Oh we like them all right, Father Adam," replied the fox, "It's just we don't know what to do with them. Are they of any use, or are they just beautiful and no more ?"
"Beautiful and no more !" cried Adam. "Why what more do you want ? Isn't it enough to be beautiful, eh ? You ungrateful rascal !"
"oh yes, of course, dear Father Adam," went on the fox very humbly, "but we should like to use our tails as well. What would you suggest that I should do with my fine bushy tail ?"
"You !" said Adam. "Why, sweep away your footprints with it, and then no one can follow you." And the fox, who was already something of a purloiner, thanked Adam with all his heart and hurried away.
 And then all the others began to crowd about Adam, begging him to tell them the best use they could mmake of their tails.
"Swish off the flies with yours, old Cow," he said to the cow.
"Balance yourself with yours, and sit up as I do," he said to the Kangaroo.
At that moment a loud squealing and squeaking was heard. It was the guinea-pig crying and sobbing that it was unfair because he had no tail. But Adam told him to take himself off, and that perhaps one day if he were good his tail might grow. Alas it never did grow, and we can only think he was a little naughty now and then.
Last of all to come were the cat and the dog together. The cat was in a very bad temper, and as the dog jostled her in his eagerness she cried, "Keep away from me, you clumsy wretch, or I'll scratch your nose."
But the dog only grinned, and lolled out his tongue.dog goes wiggy waggy xxx
"Grinning ninny !" hissed the cat. "I hate animals who are always grinning. Why do you do it, you dolt ?"
 "Because I'm happy and good-tempered," replied the Dog
"And a very good reason too," said Adam; and resting his head upon his hand he thought for a while.
Presently, raising his head, he looked at the dog and asked, "Are you often happy and pleased ?"
"Nearly always," replied the dog. "Do you know, I really believe that I like every one !"
"And would you like to show all the world when you are pleased and happy ?" asked Adam.
"He does !" interrupted the cross cat; "he grins like a nincompoop."
"Hold your tongue !" cried Adam sternly. "Very well, then,"continued Adam sternly.
"So you shall. When you feel pleased and happy, wag your tail."
"Oh splendid !" cried the dog, careering round and wagging his tail madly.
Then Adam turned to the cat.  "You had better do the same," said Adam kindly.
"I shall do nothing of the sort," replied the cat sulkily; I hate dogs. Lolling his silly tongue and wagging his silly tail, and pleased with every one."
"Well what will you do then ?" asked Adam patiently.
"Easy" said the cat. "I shall wag mine when I'm cross !" hissed the cat.
"You'll soon get tired !" laughed Adam.
"You'll wag it right off !" giggled a mouse, who had been listening.
Oops . . and that was how the first mouse came to be chased by the first cat.
And it also explains why you'll never, never, never see an angry dog wagging it's tail; but you will see cross-patch cats wagging their tails, all day and every day.

Adam and Garden


Joel Chandler Harris I would like to invite you all to come down to the deep South of America with me and meet Uncle Remus.

The Tales of Uncle Remus were wrote by Joel Chandler Harris and were the largest single collection of Afro-American folktales

Joel Chandler
Harris       ever collected and published. Between 1896 and 1918  he published around 260 tales in eight volumes, all  of them black folktales.
I absolutely adored the tales of Brer Rabbit and my
most favourite of all of them was and still is Brer Rabbit and the Tar  Baby. I used to get my mum or dad to read it to me over and over again, then when my sisters were old enough, I had them, read it as well, otherwise I cried untilThe tales of Brer Rabbit through the mouth of Uncle Remus they felt sorry for me.
Yes, I know I was a naughty girl, but I did so love the story. I hope you find it just as good. It mightn't be exactly the same as the one Uncle Remus wrote but it is how I remember it as retold by:-

 Catharine Farrell from a story retold by Joel Chandler Harris

Brer Fox and The Tar Baby

Brer Fox with the Tar Baby One day Brer Fox thought of how Brer Rabbit had been cutting up his capers and bouncing around until he'd come to believe that he was the boss of the whole gang. Brer Fox thought of a way to lay some bait for that uppity Brer Rabbit.

He went to work and got some tar and mixed it with some turpentine. He fixed up a contraption that he called a Tar-Baby. When he finished making her, he put a straw hat on her head and sat the little thing in the middle of the road. Brer Fox, he lay off in the bushes to see what would happen.

Well, he didn't have to wait long either, 'cause by and by Brer Rabbit cameBrer Foox Leaves the tar baby for Brer Rabbit pacing down the road--lippity-clippity, clippity-lippity--just as sassy as a jaybird. Brer Fox, he lay low. Brer Rabbit came prancing along until he saw the Tar-Baby and then he sat back on his hind legs like he was astonished. The Tar-Baby just sat there, she did, and Brer Fox, he lay low.

"Good morning!" says Brer Rabbit, says he. "Nice weather we're having this morning," says he.

Tar-Baby didn't say a word, and Brer Fox, he lay low.

"How are you feeling this morning?" says Brer Rabbit, says he.

Brer Fox, he winked his eye real slow and lay low and the Tar-Baby didn't say a thing.

"What is the matter with you then? Are you deaf?" says Brer Rabbit, says he. "Cause if you are, I can holler louder," says he.

The Tar-Baby stayed still and Brer Fox, he lay low.

Brer Rabbit with the Tar Baby"You're stuck-up, that's what's wrong with you. You think you're too good to talk to me," says Brer Rabbit, says he. "And I'm going to cure you, that's what I'm going to do," says he.

Brer Fox started to chuckle in his stomach, he did, but Tar-Baby didn't say a word.

"I'm going to teach you how to talk to respectable folks if it's my last act," says Brer Rabbit, says he. "If you don't take off that hat and say howdy, I'm going to bust you wide open," says he.

Tar-Baby stayed still and Brer Fox, he lay low.

Brer Rabbit kept on asking her why she wouldn't talk and the Tar-Baby kept on saying nothing until Brer Rabbit finally drew back his fist, he did, and blip--he hit the Tar-Baby on the jaw. But his fist stuck and he couldn't pull it loose. The tar held him. But Tar-Baby, she stayed still, and Brer Fox, he lay low.

"If you don't let me loose, I'm going to hit you again," says Brer Rabbit, says he, and with that he drew back his other fist and blap--he hit the Tar-Baby with the other hand and that one stuck fast too.

Tar-Baby she stayed still, and Brer Fox, he lay low.

"Turn me loose, before I kick the natural stuffing out of you," says Brer Rabbit, says he, but the Tar-Baby just sat there.

She just held on and then Brer Rabbit jumped her with both his feet. Brer Fox, he lay low. Then Brer Rabbit yelled out that if that Tar-Baby didn't turn him loose, he was going to butt her crank-sided. Then he butted her and his head got stuck.

Brer Fox walked out from behind the bushes and strolled over to BrerBrer Fox Laughes at Brer Rabit Rabbit, looking as innocent as a mockingbird.

"Howdy, Brer Rabbit," says Brer Fox, says he. "You look sort of stuck up this morning," says he. And he rolled on the ground and laughed and laughed until he couldn't laugh anymore.

By and by he said, "Well, I expect I got you this time, Brer Rabbit," says he. "Maybe I don't, but I expect I do. You've been around here sassing after me a mighty long time, but now it's the end.

And then you're always getting into something that's none of your business," says Brer Fox, says he. "Who asked you to come and strike up a conversation with this Tar-Baby? And who stuck you up the way you are? Nobody in the round world. You just jammed yourself into that Tar-Baby without waiting for an invitation," says Brer Fox, says he. "There you are and there you'll stay until I fix up a brushpile and fire it up, "cause I'm going to barbecue you today, for sure," says Brer Fox, says he.

Then Brer Rabbit started talking mighty humble.

"I don't care what you do with me, Brer Fox, says he, "Just so you don't fling me in that briar patch. Roast me, Brer Fox, says he, "But don't fling me in that briar patch."

"It's so much trouble to kindle a fire," says Brer Fox, says he, "that I expect I'd better hang you," says he.

"Hang me just as high as you please, Brer Fox, says Brer Rabbit, says he, "but for the Lord's sake, don't fling me in that briar patch," says he.

"I don't have any string, " says Brer Fox, says he, "Now I expect I had better drown you, " says he.

The Briar Patch"Drown me just as deep as you please, Brer Fox," says Brer Rabbit, says he, "But please do not fling me in that briar patch, " says he.

"There's no water near here," says Brer Fox, says he, "And now I reckon I'd better skin you," says he.

"Skin me Brer Fox," says he. "Snatch out my eyeballs, tear out my ears by the roots," says he, "But please, Brer Fox, don't fling me in that briar patch, " says he.

Of course, Brer Fox wanted to get Brer Rabbit as bad as he could, so he caught him by the behind legs and slung him right in the middle of the briar patch. There was a considerable flutter when Brer Rabbit struck the bushes, and Brer Fox hung around to see what was going to happen.Uncle Remus with a little girl

By and by he heard someone call his name and 'way up on the hill he saw Brer Rabbit sitting cross-legged on a chinquapin log combing the tar pitch out of his hair with a chip. Then Brer Fox knew he had been tricked.

                                         Uncle Remus telling the stories to a Little Girl

Then Brer Rabbit hollered out, " I was Born and bred in the briar patch!" And with that he skipped out just as lively as a cricket in the embers of a fire.

I love these little video's but they are not quite the Mr Men they look on the front cover  so please mum and dad have a look through them before allowing the very young to watch all of them.
The video show was first shown here in Seligor's Castle, way back in early 2007
on the Playtimes 4 U pages. But there are a couple of video's here that do go well in the Shaggy Dog Tales. Enjoy Seligor & Diddly xxx

                       Look out for the couple of Japanese Adverts, very quaint.

Old Mother Hubbard

Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard
To get her poor doggie a bone,

Old Mother Hubbard

But when she got there, the cupboard was bare,
And the poor little doggie had none.

She went to the baker's to buy him some bread,
But when she came back, the poor doggie was dead.

Poor doggie was dead
She went to the joiner's, to buy him a coffin,
But when she came back, the poor doggie was laughin'.

Happy Doggie
 She took a clean dish, to get him some tripe,
 But when she came back, he was smoking a pipe.
Was smoking a pipe
She went to the alehouse, to get him some beer,
But when she came back, he was sat in her chair.
Drinking a pint !!!
She went to the tavern, for wine white and red,
But when she came back, doggie s
tood on his head.
Wearing a Hat !!
She went to the hatter's, to buy him a hat,
But when she came back, he was feeding the cat.
feeding the cat
She went to the barber's, to buy him a wig,
But when she came back, he was dancing a jig.
She went to the fruiterer's, to buy him some fruit,
But when she came back , he was playing the flute.

A rainbow flute
She went to the tailor's to buy him a coat,
But when she came back he was riding a goat.

She went to the cobbler's  to buy him some shoes,
But when she came back h
e was reading the news.
Reading a newspaper
 She went to the seamstress to buy him some linen,
But when she came back the doggie was spinning.
Spinning Wheel
She went to the hosier's, to buy him some hose,
But when she came back he was dressed in his clothes.
Happy Doggie
The dame made a curtsy. The dog made a bow,
The dame said, "Your servant,"
The dog said, "Bow-wow."

Midi: Old Mother Hubbard

Nursery Rhyme & History

Origins of Old Mother Hubbard lyrics in British history

Cardinal WolseyThe Old Mother Hubbard referred to in this rhyme's words allude to the famous Cardinal Wolsey. Cardinal Thomas Wolsey was the most important statesman and churchman of the Tudor history period in 16th century England.

Cardinal Wolsey  proved to be a faithful servant but displeased the King, Henry VIII, by failing to facilitate the King's divorce from Queen Katherine of Aragon who had been his queen of many years.Katherine of Aragon
The reason for seeking the divorce and hence the creation of the Old Mother Hubbard poem was to  enable him to marry Anne Boleyn with whom he was passionately in love.

In the Old Mother Hubbard song King Henry was the "doggie" and the "bone" refers to the divorce (and not money as many believe)
The cupboard relates to the Catholic Church although the subsequent divorce arranged by Thomas Cramner resulted in the break with Rome and the formation of the English Protestant church and the demise of Old Mother Hubbard - Cardinal Wolsey.

Another rhyme reputedly related to Cardinal Wolsey is  Little Boy Blue

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Nursery Rhymes and songs available for an MP3 Player

Daybreak in JanuaryDoes she unlock the Morning do you think?

I woke at half past six today
And all outside was misty grey,

As if it still were really night
And just pretending to be light.
I only just could see the lawn,
And everything looked fast asleep;
And then I saw a something creep
Across the garden soft and slow--
It was the shadow of the dawn!

And as I watched and saw her pass,
Her dress was trailing on the grass;
She paused and seemed to hesitate
And glided through the little gate--
And then the cock began to crow.
And when she'd gone as clear as clear
I saw the trees and garden here,

The sad brown earth will things will grow

When Winter's dead (Nurse told me so!).
I saw the tiny apple tree
Which Daddy's given all to me,
I saw the house across
It's Day the way;
And as I looked at it I heard
The twitter of a little bird,
And so I knew that it was day.

This little poem was written by Almey St. John Adcock many years ago, even before Seligor was born so I thought it would be nice to include it .

revived for you by Seligor


This is the Dolben Arms it was our local in Bontnewydd
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I remember the winter of long, long ago,
with ice on the windows, deep, crispy snow.
The crunch of our feet as we went off to school,
Testing the ice on the river and pools.
That strange, silent stillness that surrounded the place,
With the feel of the snowflakes that fell on our face.

Remember the smell of wet clothing, that hung on the pegs,
The itch of the chilblains, the burn of chapped legs.
Our school milk was frozen, pushed out at the top,
Teachers a grumbling with buckets and mops.
Rows of wet gloves on the fireguard all day,
The whoops of delight when allowed out to play.

The sound of the sledge as it slid down the hill,
The laughter that followed the inevitable spill.
Snowballs that soaked me, when thrown by a friend
as we trudged our way home when it came to days end.
Our warm, secure cottage, roaring fire, hot tea,
Warm bread and dripping, my dad, sisters and me.

Written by Mrs Kathleen Farr, 2006

I have just been going through my files and in amongst them I found a Christmas card from my sister Kath. It was one she had made herself a year ago on the PC. Inside she had wrote a beautiful verse which related to our childhood for we were bought up in a tiny village in the middle of a mountain, with a steep hill to come down into the valley from every direction, it was a very beautiful childhood.
So do enjoy this wee verse my sister wrote for us. Diddily Dee Dot.
Ship a Sailing on the SeaShip a Sailing on the SeaShare Share
I Saw a Ship a Sailing

I saw a ship a-sailing,
A-sailing on the sea;
And oh, it was all laden

With pretty things for thee!

Liquorice AllsortsThere were comfits in the cabin,
And apples in the hold;
The sails were made of silk,

And the masts were made of gold.
24 White Mice

The four and twenty sailors,

That stood between the decks,
Were four and twenty white mice,
With chains about their necks.
Duck without a sack I'm afraid quack, quack.

The captain was a duck,
With a packet on his back;
Ship a Sailing on the Sea
And when the ship began to move,
The captain said, "Quack, Quack!"

A Frog went a Courtin' and He did Ride

Mr FrogA frog went a-courtin' and he did ride, M-hm,
A frog went a-courtin' and he did ride,
Sword and pistol by his side, M-hm.

He rode up to Miss Mousie's den, M-hm,
He rode up to Miss Mousie's den,
And said Miss Mouse will you let me in? M-hm.

He took Miss Mouse upon his knee, M-hm,
He took Miss Mouse upon his knee and
Said "Miss Mouse, will you marry me?" M-hm.

"Without my Uncle Rat's consent, M-hm,
Mr Frog Without my Uncle Rat's consent
I wouldn't marry the President." M-hm.

Uncle Rat laughed and shook his sides, M-hm,
Uncle Rat laughed and shook his sides,
To think his niece would be a bride, M-hm.

"Oh, where will the wedding supper be?" M-hm,
"Oh where will the wedding supper be?"
"Way down yonder in the hollow tree." M-hm.
Uncle Rat and family

"And what will the wedding supper be?" M-hm,
And what will the wedding supper be?
A slice of cake and a cup of tea. M-hm.

The first to come was Mrs Moth, M-hm,
Mr Frog The first to come was Mrs Moth;
She spread out the tablecloth, M-hm.

The next to arrive was Mr Bee, M-hm,
The next to arrive was Mr. Bee who
Played the fiddle upon his knee, M-hm.

The next to come was a Widow Flea, M-hm,
The next to come was a Widow Flea she

Danced a jig with the bumblebee, M-hm.

The next to arrive was Missus Cow, M-hm,
The next to arrive was Missus Cow she
 Tried to dance but didn't know how, M-hm.

Now Mister Frog was dressed in green, M-hm,
Now Mister Frog was dressed in green and
Sweet Miss Mouse looked like a queen, M-hm.

Parson Rook
In slowly walked the Parson Rook, M-hm,

In slowly walked the Parson Rook;Book
Mr Frog Under his arm he carried a book, M-hm.

They all gathered round the lucky pair, M-hm,
They all gathered round the lucky pair,
Singing, dancing everywhere, M-hm.

Then they all went sailing on the lake, M-hm
They all went sailing on the lake
And got gobbled up by a big fat Drake. M-hm.

Alternative last verse

Then Frog and Mouse went off to France, M-hm,
 Then Frog and Mouse went off to France and
That's the end of my romance, M-hm,

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Here be a beautiful set of little pictures for you to watch,
very strange mind. Diddily xx

Lazy Bones

Lazy Bones

Lazy Bones, sleepin' in the sun,
How you gonna get your day's work done?
Never get your day's work done,
Sleepin' in the noon-day sun.

Lazy Bones, sleepin' in the shade,
How you gonna get your cornmeal made?
Never get your cornmeal made,

Sleepin' in the noon-day shade.

And when the potatoes need sprayin',
I betcha keep prayin' th
at the bugs fall off the vine.
And when you go fishin' I betcha keep wishin'
t the fish won't grab at your line.

Lazy Bones, loafin' through the day,
Ain't never gonna make a dime that way.
You'll never make a dime that way,
And you don't hear a word I say.
Good Morning

Lazy Bones, sleepin' in the sun,
How ya gonna get your day's work done?
Never get your day's work done,
Sleepin' in the noon-day sun.

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